THE ALBUM: EVOLUTION OF AN ART FORM
JOE POX: Leon Jackson / X Factor
As if the looming dread of Christmas wasn't enough, the British public has just voted for The Most Boring & Characterless 'Pop Star' In The Entire History Of Recorded Music as the winner of X Factor.
Leon Jackson is basically a yawn with a wig and in serious need of dental work. He is so completely forgettable that, even if you were watching him on TV and closed your eyes for a second, you'd struggle to find him on-screen when you opened them again. I'm sure his own mother, on finding him sitting watching GMTV and eating Sugar Puffs on the sofa in the morning, would think that someone had broken into her house and was ruthlessly eating her cereal.
Yes, this year has been all about how Leona Lewis 'saved' the industry in Q4 with the speedy sales of her debut. She's somehow been hailed as proof that the UK has produced a credible – ah – artist with – um – longevity. OK, she sold a few records in the UK, but let's just reserve judgement until she cracks the US (which, let's face it, is probably more interested in the off-side rule in 'soccerball' than it is about her). If Leona is the 'best' we can do, then surely Leon is the very worst we can do. Imagine if Heston Blumenthal had a change of heart and decided to cook up the least perfect meal in the world; the end result would basically be Leon Jackson in puff pastry.
In a flip of the old maxim about dogs at this time of year, I say this: Leon Jackson isn't even FOR Christmas. God save us all, every one.
